Only recently did I find that I loved the simplicity of an artificial tree. For years the only way I would go was "real", but not necessarily in the way and fashion and timeliness that everyone expected out of me and the holidays. There were years where that tree finally came into our lives at the very last minute. A sort of Christmas present for the house, a remembrance of the season, all on the morning or late afternoon of Christmas Eve.
I was unemployed by choice a number of years ago. It was an uncomfortable time, but up until the holidays we didn't pay it much mind. I had spent the summer and the fall working on the house, had attended a library conference in California, taken on a few job interviews down south, put up (and put up with) the inlaws on one of their annual summer visits, and all the while kept my out-of-workness a secret to damn near everyone.
Well, secret to a point.
I wasn't out of work because I did something bad or because of hard times or a layoff. I got tired of my four hour plus a day commute, my Two Faces of Eve boss (what?) and the house being an eternal state of disrepair. I was fed up with the house being a reason for not having people over, for it being such an issue with the Estranged One, and for it being such a complete and total hazard for the kids. I had a nice chunk of cash from my retirement fund that I immediately put to use and it went a long ways to taking care of bills and repair costs and the like. But there was one big problem attached to that cash. It ran out. Well, that part was expected. The long job search wasn't. Call it hubris, but I was expecting a job to show up for me the moment I was ready for it and applied to it. Not that time, though. That job finally came through on my birthday, New Year's Eve. Happy birthday to me, indeed.
So, back to Christmas. A couple of teachers, close friends of ours, from my boys' school heard about our "plight" and found gifts for the kids and a food basket for us. Santa's booty was largely funded by my mother-in-law. Personal gifts were outlawed. And the tree? Well, let's just say that I was truly lucky that year. The tree lot at the local mall closed up shop early that year. On Christmas Eve, of all days. I went down that morning thinking I could buy a cut rate one and lo and behold there were twenty or more trees sitting there in the parking lot, all free for the taking! A true Christmas miracle! I took one for the house, the biggest we'd ever had, and picked up another one up for the sister in law, too.
No Chubby-n-Tubby tree, no lobsided tree from the Olympics, no strange dried out lot trees from Seattle, but a real one, and a mighty pretty one, too, I might add. For free. Wow.
I found a nice one a couple years ago at Lowes, a live Colorado Blue Spruce in a bucket. I had never bought a live tree before, but because it was beat and somewhat ugly it was marked down significantly. I went around and around the store that night, wondering if it was the "right" one for me. I checked out "fresh cut" trees, artificial ones and then went back to the far side of the gardening section, popped that hulking thing onto a cart and took it home with me. It was sticky, spindly, and without much charm, but it had a lot of heart, and I must say, an awful lot of soul. It was my first Christmas alone in that house, and I was going to make the best of it. Took it with me the next year into the Little House, and it was equally pleasant there as well. It's now sitting in the yard, wondering about it's fate. I think it needs to be planted, but I want it to go with me, to that final place, to the home that I will name, just like MFK Fisher, The Last House. It has too much heart just to let it go away to places unknown or be hauled off to the dump.
So, soon. I tell that tree, and myself, just be patient.
But for now I have an artificial tree that I bought last year at St Vinnies for five bucks. You told me many times over how you would go back and forth with your trees..one year a real tree, the next year the artificial one. Last year you had company, a Christmas wedding to host. I imagine that year was real. Cycles being what they are I know what this year will bring. The artificial tree and a road trip. As for mine, I've come to like it, and The Boy thinks it's grand. We put lights on last night and the ornaments will go on this weekend.
I don't know what happened to that little bird ornament you gave me, as it and all the decorations I had for my little Colorado Blue Spruce somehow disappeared once I came back home. Someday I will find it, along with all my other nifty tin and glass ornaments I had acquired during that long and cold Christmas of '05. It is the only thing that I have from you that fits the holiday. It was so last minute, that bird. You were leaving on a major road trip to the Grand Canyon and I was preparing for a trip to Boise. Sigh. That bird is a solitary reminder of what we shared, a love on the wing.
This year I will be home again and my assorted trees will be there to brighten my holidays. I wish for you and yours a wonderful holiday season, whereever you may be.
Your WHMB
I was unemployed by choice a number of years ago. It was an uncomfortable time, but up until the holidays we didn't pay it much mind. I had spent the summer and the fall working on the house, had attended a library conference in California, taken on a few job interviews down south, put up (and put up with) the inlaws on one of their annual summer visits, and all the while kept my out-of-workness a secret to damn near everyone.
Well, secret to a point.
I wasn't out of work because I did something bad or because of hard times or a layoff. I got tired of my four hour plus a day commute, my Two Faces of Eve boss (what?) and the house being an eternal state of disrepair. I was fed up with the house being a reason for not having people over, for it being such an issue with the Estranged One, and for it being such a complete and total hazard for the kids. I had a nice chunk of cash from my retirement fund that I immediately put to use and it went a long ways to taking care of bills and repair costs and the like. But there was one big problem attached to that cash. It ran out. Well, that part was expected. The long job search wasn't. Call it hubris, but I was expecting a job to show up for me the moment I was ready for it and applied to it. Not that time, though. That job finally came through on my birthday, New Year's Eve. Happy birthday to me, indeed.
So, back to Christmas. A couple of teachers, close friends of ours, from my boys' school heard about our "plight" and found gifts for the kids and a food basket for us. Santa's booty was largely funded by my mother-in-law. Personal gifts were outlawed. And the tree? Well, let's just say that I was truly lucky that year. The tree lot at the local mall closed up shop early that year. On Christmas Eve, of all days. I went down that morning thinking I could buy a cut rate one and lo and behold there were twenty or more trees sitting there in the parking lot, all free for the taking! A true Christmas miracle! I took one for the house, the biggest we'd ever had, and picked up another one up for the sister in law, too.
No Chubby-n-Tubby tree, no lobsided tree from the Olympics, no strange dried out lot trees from Seattle, but a real one, and a mighty pretty one, too, I might add. For free. Wow.
I found a nice one a couple years ago at Lowes, a live Colorado Blue Spruce in a bucket. I had never bought a live tree before, but because it was beat and somewhat ugly it was marked down significantly. I went around and around the store that night, wondering if it was the "right" one for me. I checked out "fresh cut" trees, artificial ones and then went back to the far side of the gardening section, popped that hulking thing onto a cart and took it home with me. It was sticky, spindly, and without much charm, but it had a lot of heart, and I must say, an awful lot of soul. It was my first Christmas alone in that house, and I was going to make the best of it. Took it with me the next year into the Little House, and it was equally pleasant there as well. It's now sitting in the yard, wondering about it's fate. I think it needs to be planted, but I want it to go with me, to that final place, to the home that I will name, just like MFK Fisher, The Last House. It has too much heart just to let it go away to places unknown or be hauled off to the dump.
So, soon. I tell that tree, and myself, just be patient.
But for now I have an artificial tree that I bought last year at St Vinnies for five bucks. You told me many times over how you would go back and forth with your trees..one year a real tree, the next year the artificial one. Last year you had company, a Christmas wedding to host. I imagine that year was real. Cycles being what they are I know what this year will bring. The artificial tree and a road trip. As for mine, I've come to like it, and The Boy thinks it's grand. We put lights on last night and the ornaments will go on this weekend.
I don't know what happened to that little bird ornament you gave me, as it and all the decorations I had for my little Colorado Blue Spruce somehow disappeared once I came back home. Someday I will find it, along with all my other nifty tin and glass ornaments I had acquired during that long and cold Christmas of '05. It is the only thing that I have from you that fits the holiday. It was so last minute, that bird. You were leaving on a major road trip to the Grand Canyon and I was preparing for a trip to Boise. Sigh. That bird is a solitary reminder of what we shared, a love on the wing.
This year I will be home again and my assorted trees will be there to brighten my holidays. I wish for you and yours a wonderful holiday season, whereever you may be.
Your WHMB
No comments:
Post a Comment