This last week I took a walk in the Woods. I came across some advertising over by the homebuyer's center a few weeks ago and thought I would try to find the big regional trail that was mentioned on the kiosk map. It looked fairly straightforward to me that afternoon, but the day I decided to take a walk I failed to stop in and take another look. Didn't take anything remotely like the "ten essentials" along with me, either. Heck, the only thing I took with me that afternoon was my enthusiasm to be out walking around where you and I walked years ago.
Different trail, different time of day, same results. A myriad of switchbacks and poorly marked trails that lead to me being a bit late and bit more than worried. This time, just like that time, I didn't give myself enough time. That morning, what was it? Mid September, a middle of the week work day? The phone call came in much earlier than anything I would have expected from you. You told me you were out walking, would I like to join you? Heck, would I? I was dressed and out the door with about an hour to spare before my shift started. We met and took off down the Huckleberry path. Before too long it meandered and joined up with something else entirely and before we knew it my window of time was blown and you were apologizing every other step.
Different trail, different time of day, same results. A myriad of switchbacks and poorly marked trails that lead to me being a bit late and bit more than worried. This time, just like that time, I didn't give myself enough time. That morning, what was it? Mid September, a middle of the week work day? The phone call came in much earlier than anything I would have expected from you. You told me you were out walking, would I like to join you? Heck, would I? I was dressed and out the door with about an hour to spare before my shift started. We met and took off down the Huckleberry path. Before too long it meandered and joined up with something else entirely and before we knew it my window of time was blown and you were apologizing every other step.
I told you not to worry but I still gave a lot of thought to the time because I was on this crazy "no tardy excuses" probation thing at work. Before too long we managed to find a way out of the woods, about a quarter mile down the road from where my car was parked. Not only did we have a hard trot ahead of us but we also ran into some folks whom you knew which required a civil chat on our parts and a bit of a slowdown, too. To top it all off I took off down a road that had no easy access to the highway. That smooth move required a doubling back and before I knew it I was twenty minutes late for work.
Good thing for me my boss was late that morning, too.
Fast forward three years and I did it again. Took off down an unmarked trail there in the Woods and got tangled up in the greenery. Did it again this last week, too. I have to wonder if when surveyors go out to look for new homesites if half the time they don't find the shriveled remains of long lost homeowners or other hapless types who thought that it would be "fun" to go out walking along those treasured paths that the company touts. Tuesday's walk was great at first. It was late afternoon, quiet and peaceful there along the Big Pond trail. It had rained earlier in the day and the path was regularly filled with large puddles that were easy to get around but always managed to be in the way of an easy walk. I got to the top of the pond, and instead of turning around I decided to go "all the way". That led me to a few crossroads, an unmarked trail and finally, two wooden bat houses later, to a trail that dropped me off at a playground a quarter mile up from my car.
The big thrill wasn't being late this time, but passing by the top of your street. It was all I could do not to break out into a showtune from My Fair Lady as I trotted by.
So, tonight I was out and about and running the last of errands. I was deep into a rain shower and was finishing up my daily run of the stations of the cross when I thought of that night when the word "firewall" was a meaningful verb in our lives. I thought of rain and reluctance and the desire to turn around and finish up what we had started but then thought about the woods and the need to get back home, about that breathy finish at the end of our hard walk, about those flushed faces and all the apologies, about the hard run to work and the need to absolve ourselves from any misdeeds or misgivings. No regrets about throwing up those firewalls, no sir.
The other day I realized once I started that walk I was into something that I had no choice but to finish. Somehow I feel the same need here. With these words, with the novel, with our photos out and about around my house, I feel the need to finish something, whatever that is. Somehow I think that our story is still not being told the way that it needs to be told. I know that we have long ago come to our trail ends, that this Minute Man needs to keep to the terms of that probation you set for me, but still. I am a disciplined trail walker, but I am also a man who has no intention of staying on the reservation just because the Detective or God says so.
I am the man who kept the firewalls up for you, and I am the man who, when the time comes, will tear them down for you as well if that is what you should so desire. In the woods or out in the open. And when that time comes, no running, no apologies and no regrets.
Your WHMB
Good thing for me my boss was late that morning, too.
Fast forward three years and I did it again. Took off down an unmarked trail there in the Woods and got tangled up in the greenery. Did it again this last week, too. I have to wonder if when surveyors go out to look for new homesites if half the time they don't find the shriveled remains of long lost homeowners or other hapless types who thought that it would be "fun" to go out walking along those treasured paths that the company touts. Tuesday's walk was great at first. It was late afternoon, quiet and peaceful there along the Big Pond trail. It had rained earlier in the day and the path was regularly filled with large puddles that were easy to get around but always managed to be in the way of an easy walk. I got to the top of the pond, and instead of turning around I decided to go "all the way". That led me to a few crossroads, an unmarked trail and finally, two wooden bat houses later, to a trail that dropped me off at a playground a quarter mile up from my car.
The big thrill wasn't being late this time, but passing by the top of your street. It was all I could do not to break out into a showtune from My Fair Lady as I trotted by.
So, tonight I was out and about and running the last of errands. I was deep into a rain shower and was finishing up my daily run of the stations of the cross when I thought of that night when the word "firewall" was a meaningful verb in our lives. I thought of rain and reluctance and the desire to turn around and finish up what we had started but then thought about the woods and the need to get back home, about that breathy finish at the end of our hard walk, about those flushed faces and all the apologies, about the hard run to work and the need to absolve ourselves from any misdeeds or misgivings. No regrets about throwing up those firewalls, no sir.
The other day I realized once I started that walk I was into something that I had no choice but to finish. Somehow I feel the same need here. With these words, with the novel, with our photos out and about around my house, I feel the need to finish something, whatever that is. Somehow I think that our story is still not being told the way that it needs to be told. I know that we have long ago come to our trail ends, that this Minute Man needs to keep to the terms of that probation you set for me, but still. I am a disciplined trail walker, but I am also a man who has no intention of staying on the reservation just because the Detective or God says so.
I am the man who kept the firewalls up for you, and I am the man who, when the time comes, will tear them down for you as well if that is what you should so desire. In the woods or out in the open. And when that time comes, no running, no apologies and no regrets.
Your WHMB
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